A seat reserved for the real Mr. Movies

Tim Greening passed away suddenly Wednesday. He will be dearly missed by everyone who relied on his wit to brighten a morning.

The longtime Times columnist was a legendary movie and TV buff. The Robinson Film Center, a movie art house currently under construction in downtown Shreveport, has decided to dedicate a future seat in his honor.

Here’s a note from RFC’s Chris Jay: “(We) are going to name a seat in the Grand Theater for him. He would always drop us lines of encouragement. When we booked ‘For Your Consideration,’ he worked for like three days trying to get Harry Shearer to come to our screening and very nearly made it happen. I only met him a few times, but we'd been e-mailing for years, and I counted him among my friends. I just wanted to extend my condolences and let you know that we're naming a seat for him, just to say ‘Thanks’ for all of his support and encouragement of my programming.”

Below are just a few choice excerpts from Tim’s columns and writings.

From the column “The best of 2006: Penguins and prejudice with my popcorn,” Dec. 30, 2006
At the box office, penguins have been hotter than the greenhouse gases that threaten their very existence. "March of the Penguins," "Madagascar" and "Happy Feet," all big hits. So it was inevitable Hollywood would try to expand the genre with "The Pursuit of Happyfeetness." Known for comedic roles, Mumble the penguin turns to drama as a single father struggling to raise his chick in New York while going through the pilot training program at United Airlines. Needless to say, this flightless waterfowl teaches us a lesson in learning to fly. At the screening I attended, there was not a dry eye in the house, and considering all the penguins in the audience, very few dry seats.

From the column “It’s literally too hot for television,” July 15, 2006
Greening writes here about the filming of the NBC TV movie, “The Year Without a Santa Claus,” which was shot in Natchitoches in 100-plus degree heat.
And poor John Goodman — did you see the picture of him in The Times the other day, wearing a Santa suit? I'll bet they have to wring that out every half-hour.
I considered showing up to be an extra, but now I'm not so sure. I probably say this every year, but I swear I don't remember it ever being this hot before. How hot is it?
It's so hot even the Tabasco is sweating.
It's so hot U.S. Rep. William Jefferson took all his cash out of the refrigerator to make room in it for himself.
It's so hot people are sitting all the way through Al Gore's global warming documentary not for the information but for the air conditioning.
It's so hot Ted Williams' son tried to freeze himself.
It's so hot farmers are harvesting already-steamed asparagus.
It's so hot Kevin Federline actually got up off the couch to turn up the ceiling fan.
It's so hot kids are begging bullies to give them a swirlie.
It's so hot Ann Coulter scheduled a meeting with
9/11 widows just for the cold reception.
We're talking hot.

From the column “Check Your Brain at the Box Office,” Jan. 15, 2005
"Two tickets to 'Sideways,' please."
"Sorry, sir, that movie's not playing here."
"What? The offbeat comedy about a neurotic bachelor who takes his soon-to-be-married friend on a road trip through California's wine country? But it's won practically every critics award there is. Even the Shreveport Film Critics Society Circle named it Best Picture of 2004, and none of us have even seen it."
"Shreveport has a Film Critics Society Circle?"
"Well, yeah, but it's just me and this guy named Rufus. And he only likes movies about rapping kangaroos."
"I see."
"So, why isn't 'Sideways' playing here?"
"Well, intelligent, highly acclaimed independent films don't play well in this town. If a movie isn't based on a comic book or a video game or if the title doesn't end in and the Bandit, it doesn't make money here."

From the satire page News for Dumb Guys, Aug. 6, 2004
A peek at the statistics that shape dumb guys' lives
Only a nitwit would give away a movie's ending. So, what's the big secret about 'The Village?'
47% Those scary creatures in the woods? Visa collection agents
33% The Village falls way short of the population requirement to be incorporated as a village
21% The big secret: the movie sucks

From the column “A vacation dose of all the print that's news to fit,” Sept. 7, 2002
Bear with me, I was on vacation for the last third of August, during which I traveled to Los Angeles to compete in Fox television's newest talent competition, 'American Idle: The Search for the Laziest Man in America.'
I won, of course, but I never picked up my trophy. (It was all the way across the room, up on the stage. I just didn't feel like it; there were stairs.)